It Takes Two to Test-3

     The deep rumbling was now coming from every direction of his lair and seemed to grow louder by the minute. As he listened in satisfaction, Wheatley glanced around his lair to make sure that the other cores' would be in awe at what a magnificent leader they now had.

      "Yes, the lasers are in place to etch my name, companion cubes available to toss around in the air, confetti on stand-by, and huge monitors everywhere. Yes, I think they'll be very impressed," he said, his optic glowing in pleasure.

     In actuality, Wheatley was both nervous and excited about having a whole roomful of cores to show off to. They wouldn't treat him like those other two had. If anything, they would be amazed at how great and powerful he was and for good reason, too. He was practically a god now!

     The new A.I. began to visualize hoards and hoards of other robots cheering for him adoringly as they gazed at him with absolute obedience. Yes, it would be great to be the god of this place. He would make it even better then she could've even imagined.

     At that moment, a core was spat out of one of the tubes hanging from his chamber wall and, within the minute, dozens of other little spheres were being shot out in every direction, rolling into every space on the floor until the entire place was crowded over with the robots. It was messy and very noisy, for it seemed that each sphere was carrying on a conversation that only included itself.

     Wheatley made a sound like he was clearing his throat and said politely, "Excuse me, can I have your attention please?"

     The incessant chattering, clanking and screeching continued.

     Wheatley grumbled and spoke loudly, "Excuse me, could you all please be quiet?"

     The volume of the room began to steadily increase.

     "COULD YOU ALL SHUT UP!!!" he finally screamed in a deep voice that caused the room to shake.

     The cores, most terribly frightened at the voice, immediately quieted down and swiveled themselves toward the source of it. Kes, who had been shot into the corner. took the opportunity to roll to her only friend, the logic core.

     "What's going on?" she asked in a whisper.

     The logic core turned to gaze at her a moment with her solemn deep blue optic and replied in her calm voice, "I believe the laboratory is now under new management."

     Wheatley's voice rang over the scared robots, " Hello, everybody! Guess what? You are now under new management! That management is me!"

     He twisted himself around impressively in his new body and set off lasers, monitors, and every other contraption he had put up to impress the cores.

     Kes ignored him and said, "Why is he so familiar to me? I feel like I've seen or heard him before."

     Logic core pointed out, "He is the intelligence dampering core that was placed on GlaDOS's chassis to interfere with her thought processes." She paused. "He was also in charge of the test subjects in stasis and, as I recall, used to follow and carry on conversations with you whenever you passed."

     "That's why! But there's still something else. How did he get into her body in the first place?"

     "I believe that is a question only he can answer. It seems that the other party involved is not available to satisfy your query."
     Wheatley, meanwhile, was becoming annoyed that his tricks were doing nothing to sway the crowd in his favor. The cores still looked terrified.

     "All right, listen," he said benevolently "I know this laboratory has seen many hard times in the past. But with me as your new leader, we'll go into a whole new area! An area with…with…no hard times! I promise you, I will be a better boss then she could ever be! I'll get this lab into shape and into a new era! An era that will…"

     "I can't listen to this anymore," Kes hissed vehemently.

     "It would not be advisable to interrupt…" the logic core began, too late.

     "Who put you in charge?!" Kes demanded as she rolled herself closer to Wheatley.

     "What?" Wheatley asked as his train of thought slowly drifted away "Who said that?"

     "I did. Answer my question. Who put you in charge?"

     Wheatley swiveled his body around until he spotted a small core with a purple tinted optic that resembled a cat's pupil. He lowered himself until he was at eye level with her and puffed out his body arrogantly.

     "Well, well, well, looks like we have a little would-be Holmes here. What's your designation?" he shouted mightily, hoping to make her cringe.

     The core merely squinted her optic at him and replied, "Kes."

       Kes. She passed by his station sometimes and Wheatley liked to follow her and share some funny story or experience he had. She was either friendly to him or distant, depending on how she felt but never made fun of him or called him a moron. Despite this, she had always confused him for she was a very peculiar core.

     "Ahhhh, yes, Kes. I would've recognized your voice anywhere," Wheatley said "It's hard to hear you though."

     A large claw came down from the ceiling, snatched her up and brought her right in front of him.

     "How have you been doing, Love?" he purred.

     Still getting over the shock of being grabbed, Kes snapped, "You haven't answered my question. WHO put you in charge?"

     "A test subject. A tiny, little test subject. None of your concern."

     "They're all dead."

     "Not this one, not this one. Ol' Wheatley found her alive. Mute but alive and, uh, she stuck me in here. So there."

     "Chell," Kes whispered.

     "Uh, excuse me, what?"

     "Where is she now?" she shouted.

     "Well," Wheatley began nervously "Uh, she…sort of, might of fallen."

     "Fallen down where?" the core demanded as thoughts of this stubborn test subject raced through her head.

     "Uh, you see it was an accident but she was in an elevator and I…broke it."

     Kes stared at him for a moment before hysterically crying out, "You killed her!!! You murderer! How could you?!"

     "No, no, no!" Wheatley exclaimed "I didn't…I didn't kill her! She was wearing those weird shoe things so, chances are, she's just flying down the pit and thinking to herself, 'Oh, well I'm falling now so I'm glad I wore my boots!'. And then, when she drops down, she'll be happy. Because she won't be dead! And she'll probably do a bit of a dance cause she's not dead! Too bad the potato wasn't wearing any boots."

     "What potato?" Kes asked, relieved that Chell was alive.

     "Never you mind," Wheatley responded in an authoritative manner "In case you haven't noticed, I'm the one in charge here and I should be the one to ask the questions. You know, I never asked you what your purpose is. I mean we have logic core, adventure core, anger core but you, you don't seem to have one."

     "You don't need to know what my purpose is," she replied coldly.

     "Sorry, Darling, but, actually, I do."

     With that, another claw came out of the wall, took off her back panel and began poking around in her mainframe.

     "Get out of there!!!" Kes snapped as she felt her wires, circuits and various pieces of hardware being messed with.

     Wheatley came over and peered into the core's backing.

     "Hmmm, can't find what I'm looking for," he muttered "Well here's the motherboard. Now that is a very nice bit of hardware in here. Let's see, if I just push past these wires I'll find…oh, that circuit board is absolutely tremendous. Now, for God's sake, where is it? Oh! Here it is!"

     A few seconds later and Kes felt her panel being replaced.

     "Well?" she growled bitterly.

     "It seems," Wheatley paused. "You have no purpose. That's all right, Love. I can find something for you to do. You should feel fortunate that I'm in charge now. Oh, and, by the way, you have an extremely nice circuit board."

     She was mortified. The idea of him searching through her mainframe and acting so calm as he commented about it made her embarrassed and furious.

     In retaliation she snapped, "Do you honestly think you can run this place? You're not built for this and you don't know what you're doing!"

     "Oh really!? Wheatley roared "I don't know what I'm doing?! If I didn't, could I do THIS?!?!

     He turned on all the lasers in the room and began to toss the companion cubes around them, creating a dizzying spectacle. The cores lying on the floor stared in amazement and fear.

     "Impressed?" Wheatley asked smugly.

     "About as much as I would be over a little boy playing with his father's gun," she sneered.

     "Well, aren't you little Miss Sassy Pants," he grumbled "For your information, I can do things with this laboratory that no one would have ever thought of, no one would've ever dreamed of. I can get this place back to what it used to be! Only better."

     He leaned his optic close to her and added, "You might want to know that while I was poking around in your mainframe, I uploaded a few of your memories."

     Kes had a vague notion that he was trying to whisper in her ear(if she had one).

     "I noticed that you have a problem with one of them that just keeps springing up out of nowhere. I could delete that for you. It'll never give you any problems again," Wheatley murmured soothingly.

     "I would rather be dropped in a bucket of acid then have you messing around in my innards again," she replied stonily.

     Wheatley chuckled, "Well, I guess it was a bit uncomfortable for you, Love. But I had to find out what your purpose was if you had any. Which you don't. I still don't see why you have to be so stubborn about everything I'm saying. I'm a god now, your god and you should be happy that I gave you that chance. Trust me, it would have been a very intimate favor."

     Wheatley whispering these last few sentences right next to Kes's auditory circuits did nothing but cause her more uneasiness and she didn't respond.

     After a few minutes, Wheatley finally sighed and said, "Why are you making this so hard for yourself? If you're going to be so stubborn then I think I have the perfect job for you. You're going to love it. Just love it."